Razak Mohaideen gets serious

Or not.

“Yes, I’ve added light elements to the story so it will appeal to the Malaysian crowd. But the issue behind it remains a serious one,” explained Razak.

Getting raped by your own father never seemed funny until now! Like, LOL!!

Cinta Fotokopi is a serious movie with a comic twist [The Star]

"Hey Oz, I had fun! BFF! xoxo Malaysia"

Australia was hitting on Malaysia like crazy during the latter's visit to the country, "[sprinkling] adjectives freely" in a speech praising her for being such a nice gal. Who can blame Malaysia for feeling hot and horny from this surprising attention? After all, we ALL know Australia is hung like a sheep on one of those "enlargement pills" we read so much about from the e-mails we get in our inbox. After dessert, Australia reached across the candlelit table and held Malaysia's hand, looked her in the eye and whispered:

"You come to Australia as a friend. Your country is very important to Australia. We share a lot of history. [You mean] much to Australia."

Malaysia has been waiting for this moment for a long time. Night after night when she's alone in her bed, hands roaming wild across the contours of her land, she's always imagined how it'd feel to hear Australia mutter those sweet words of longing. She knew it was her turn, and "was just as gracious."

She took off one of her shoes, slid her foot slowly up Australia's leg until she reached his crotch and felt a considerable bulge there. Elated, she breathily said, "I want this 'solid superstructure'. Now. Your place?"

Pope popped

Yup, eternal damnation for me.

Pope John Paul II Dies at 84

One table in Hell for the New Straits Times, please.

From the sensitive people at the NST:

Theo Ho Seng made a living out of predicting the future, but he did not foresee the tragedy that oil lamps placed near the front gate of his house would bring.

PS: Good to be back, y'all. I know I said a month, but good guys come late, right? (you can roll your eyes now)